Avoid Treating it as a Loss
One of the worst things you can do for yourself and for your loved one in jail is treat this as a loss. You did not lose your loved one. He or she is still alive. You can still talk on the phone, write letters, and physically visit him or her in prison. You cannot mourn this situation like you would the death of a loved one. There is one thing you must know: Others might not offer much support when a loved one is in jail like they would if your loved one had died.
Seek Counseling
It might be a difficult situation for you to get used to when a loved one is incarcerated. Aside from seeking answers from your attorney, you might also want to seek counseling from an experienced therapist. This allows you to talk about your feelings without worrying you will hurt your loved one emotionally. You will also be taught coping lessons and other ways to help heal while your loved one is in prison.
Communicate with Your Loved One
Communicate with your loved one as often as you can. This includes writing letters, making phone calls, and visiting in-person. If your loved one writes you letters, make sure you answer those letters. Make sure you take his or her phone calls. If you miss the call, be sure to return the call as soon as you can. Do not rely solely on writing and talking on the phone. You need to visit your loved one often, if possible. This will help keep the relationship going and it shows the loved one that you support him or her.
Along the same lines, make sure you are as upbeat as you can be when talking to or visiting your loved one in jail. Tell each other jokes, laugh about life, and try not to dwell on what happened or what once was a great life outside of prison. This will only upset you and your loved one. Have conversations about your children, your job, sports, or anything else your loved one enjoys so it feels like you are simply having a regular conversation.
Encourage Interaction
Encourage your loved one in prison to interact with others in an effort to make friends. Having others to talk to while in prison can make life a little bit easier for your loved one. You should also encourage your loved one to take part in the activities offered in prison. Some prisons offer classes for prisoners and volunteering opportunities in the community. There is no reason your loved one can not spend time volunteering or taking a class to better him or herself in preparation for release.
Schedule an Appointment with an Attorney Today
An excellent way to deal with a loved one who is incarcerated is to have contact with an experienced criminal defense attorney. Call the office of David Freidberg as soon as possible at 312-560-7100. You will benefit from having an experienced attorney on your side whom you can call whenever an issue arises.
(image courtesy of Javier Villaraco)